Father's Day Prep - Dads ONLY

General The Pub
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Welcome to the ELR Treehouse - Dads Only. Ew no girls …get otta here! Kooties! Kooties!

Ok the coast is clear …just us Dads. The time is now to start setting up your Fathers day with some final …subtle hints. For all we do all year long this is our DAY. It’s not a day of celebration it’s a day OF PAYBACK! :wink:

Let’s get started shall we? Ok first, start a conversation with the Mrs. “I’m really looking forward to some breakfast in bed this Sunday” You can expect two responses. Either she rolls her eyes and says “oh reeally?” or she gives you an evil grin and that come hither look, which is how all this started. If she gives you that look the conversation is over. Stop talking. You can only unsell at this point.

If she’s an eyeroller… well, time to suggest your favorite breakfast menu. But be evilly creative with stuff she’ll have to go to like 5 stores to find. “Oh yeah I’d love a crispy Belgian Waffle with Lingonberry jam some home fries, soft boiled quail eggs and some crispy fried pancetta (Italian bacon) I love you honey, but your eyes are gonna stick if you keep doing that…”

Those damn kids …ungrateful. Hey remind them that you can’t wait to spend some time with them you love them so much …and then drop some hints. “Oh you don’t have to buy me anything, I’d be glad if you just did something nice like clean out the garage …mow the lawn …take out the trash …wash the dog…” you get the idea.

Also smart to schedule that early while “while it’s cool outside” as my Dad used to say, translation while mommy is giving you “breakfast”. Hey? The day has just begun! Rule #1 don’t lift a finger. Breakfast in bed is followed by lunch in front of the TV/computer … 'Oh could you bring me a sandwich? Oh you know what sounds good? …an Italian Sub from that place downtown [insert frosty beverage request here].

While Mom and the kids are heading downtown to pickup your Dad sandwich, check the movies at the local theater online. Peruse all the movies your wifie and kids would love to see… because we’re not going to any of those …unless its actually the one you really want to see. Might as well cement the deal and buy tickets online now …no backing out now, no going over to your sister-in-laws for dinner …sweet!

After the movie tell the kids “hey lets not go to dinner lets get like a ton of ice cream and toppings…” because there’s nothing kids like better than ice cream …well maybe ticking off Mom …whose iris are now permanently stuck in an upwards position “Ok Mr. Man we can’t have ice cream for dinner…” the kids respond “Oh oHoHohOHH come on Mom!!!” and you calmly state “My day my call…” decision made.

You are the King …well until midnight …but that’s four hours away and nothing knocks kids out faster than 4 bowls of icecream :smirk: iyaknowwhatImsayin’ Ok ok be quiet here they come! [high fiving]

Ok girls you can come in now …what@?! we weren’t talking about anything?! JeeeeeeezLouise~ so paranoid… HapPy FaThErs DaY!

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Go head, do that and when you wake up the next morning half you beard one eyebrow and the opposite side of your head will be shaved and the important parts will be superglued to your legs both of them now try to walk away when the Mrs. brings in the enama bag. Nope not me, I’m not gonna do it.

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I expect I’ll get that Lynx set I hinted at about a week ago … because I need a new shave bag [nice leather one it comes in] … that’s how exciting I am :smiley:

If my missus is doing anything special for me, there’s only 2 things I want - and both begin with B

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Thanks oh wised one. Now I have time to hide all the superglue, razors, and Sharpie pens :smirk:

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LOL. So much truth, so much comedy. And the included warning/reminder of ‘Just don’t push it too far…’ = priceless.

Happy Father’s day to all the dads who’ve earned it and so richly deserve it. (real fathers rarely get enough/proper credit -especially in this day and age!

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Amen to that, like Keano Reeves says in Parenthood, you have to have a license to catch a fish, you have to have a license drive but they’ll let any … be a dad.

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As a step-father of two awesome young men (I’ve been in their lives since they were 7 and 5) now hitting 27 and 25, I can honestly say, it has been the toughest - yet most rewarding career I’ve ever had.

I have two great sons that honestly have done very well for themselves, and today they did something I never would have imagined:

They cooked my world famous Cast Iron Skillet breakfast burritos for me, I was choked up for a bit - especially when you think of the fact that my younger son just got a job as a sous chef for a Hotel Restaurant in Detroit.

Today… was a great day.

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And that ladies and gent’s is a PRIME example of what a real dad is! Doesn’t necessarily auto-equate to biological (at least in my book), but a man that steps up, does the right thing, out of love and… I digress. You get the point. lol

Kudos to every father like you! The world needs more of them, and in every culture and walk of life.
Again, thanks to those that have been, are, and will become such men.

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