A PUBLIC and Civil Discussion on the Rules

Man, I’d love to know how many time ya’ll got a flag because of me… and how I must of been teetering on the verge of corner time.

@VapeyMama the only thing I believe might be needed is a topic disclaimer (I could care less if you had a disclaimer or not). I don’t believe your style or content should needlessly be changed.

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I agree in a way but how many threads started by people with language problems are getting derailed? Seriously, any question asked usually gets a (good) response within minutes, no matter what time of the day it is. I don’t have a problem if somebody who is a bit intimidated calls for help if necessary. I have no idea what the mods here get on their plates but I’m sure they aren’t all weak members or people with language problems.
I know for a fact that in funny situations the more experienced users often send PMs to the weak or to people who had unpleasant replies from others to check on them and help them to get their problems sorted.
Anyway, I just believe that it shouldn’t be a big deal to tell somebody to please stay on topic. That’s just few words and I can’t imagine a single person here on ELR who wouldn’t get serious and back on topic after being asked to.
Call me an anarchist but i prefer self regulation before somebody else taking control of all aspects of life.

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Naw I was just pointing out there’s two sides to the coin… in reading this thread it seems the major complaint is threads getting derailed.
Yes people derailing treads is a problem, but also people not flagging these derailments is another problem.

The mods can’t be everywhere 100% of the time… it’s not their job…

They’re not forum police either, yea they help enforce the rules of the forum. But majority of their punishment consist of cleaning up messes…

If anything they are forum janitors

image

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Yeah, I am now thinking the same thing.

Okay, thought over.

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@CallMeTut I may be incorrect, and I probably am, but I inferred from @JoJo ‘s later post that if your post is flagged, you’re notified.

Yep, just confirmed it with @Cutlass92.

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I hope you were flagging him as inappropriate

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I agree with the idea that there’s really not much difference at all between certain reviews, and certain frequent and well known “sex-drift-commentors”.

The important point of distinction for me is:

You summed it up perfectly IMO.

IMO, there ABSOLUTELY IS a genuine difference.
If folks know to expect it, the onus is on them.

As far as reviews, leave them where they are, and add/require a warning if need be.

As far as commentary, mild and subtle innuendo shouldn’t be an issue in “general population” (but kept to a reasonable minimum).

“Raunchier” or obviously risqué comments should be kept to designated (and properly denoted) areas, yet still not fall into XXX/explicit domain IMO. As has been said, there’s plenty of that in the rest of the Web.

Thanks for your time and consideration.

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You seem to feel these are two separate groups of people. I disagree.

Speaking strictly for myself, I absolutely can be right at home with, and one of, the most technical, detailed, and focused individuals, as are many others here.

I agree with, and like the idea of, a “serious” or “on topic only” indicator.

Further, I like the idea of the poster having some level of control over how the thread progresses. But in reality, I don’t think it’s a good idea, as it’s quite likely to only foster animosity by those whose posts are removed. Flagging or moderators serve as a nice, neutral buffer for just such reasons IMO.

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If we were voting, I’d vote for the reviews to remain as they are. Your review titles give ample warning as far as I’m concerned and I do enjoy reading them. Same goes for @Steampugs reviews and anyone else’s. To be completely honest, the innuendo in the review itself is nothing compared to the imagery in my head. Those images are put there by me. Your words are just words (not trying to minimize anyone’s writing skills at all here.). Others may not see it the same as I do and I respect that.
I will paraphrase my earlier statement: If I don’t like it, I don’t read it.

I would hate to have to remove my last remaining marble and leave it in the Saloon.

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For now one can just put [Serious] as the first word of the tittle. Until we can look into something permanent, if even possible. This will also help when searching the forums for serious only topics.

On every single forum i have spent time on where this was allowed it turned out exactly as you have suggested it would. Every time.

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While the point is obvious… What is also obvious and quite divisive is looking down on others from your vaulted palace of safety.

If you care to share such valuable information with the common folk… Please consider adjusting for the change in altitude. The air is obviously thin up there.

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Indeed. And that’s precisely the type of class division we need to try and curtail. My thought is, if a thread is getting derailed, say something to the offending party(s). If they refuse to respect you, flag them. I’m guilty of not doing this and just diving in someone’s esophagus with knives in both hands a spurs on my boots. Oh, it’s effective. But it’s a short term fix.

My hunch is these conversations the past 48 hrs has shed some real light on the issue for most people, and that ELR will do as it’s always done, which is an auto-correct.

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Very wise observations, and thoughtfully shared as always my good man! :smiley:

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Absolutely not.
Rules = moderator’s responsibility.

Saying you don’t approve or disagree is on the individual community member.

“Community veterans” are one of many means to hopefully assist a user who’s in need. Whether it’s with a technique, sourcing, general familiarity, navigation, ideas on flavors, who to ask about tobacco, or fruits, or custards, etc.

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I’m sorry in advance that this turned into a dissertation but a lot of these things have been on my mind for a while now.

A lot has been said in here about why adult themes are sometimes acceptable and sometimes not, about where such a thing should be allowed and so forth. Without rehashing it all, I’d just like to voice my full support for the reviews to remain in the public forum. The blatant and sudden derails should stop, we’ve all done it, we all need to do better.

It can be a lot trickier to police an occasional bit of sauciness in an otherwise straight laced thread or the natural progression of one topic blending into another. This is where I hope to focus my thoughts but coming from an angle that, near as I can tell, has only been touched upon. It needs to be stated bluntly.

If this comes off as if I’m some kind of know-it-all or ass kisser and that’s not my intention. It’s just that so many people treat mods like the baby sitter/fairy godmother/concierge and it’s not right. It’s pissing me off.

How many people have been PMing the mods anyway? No, these mods you’re pestering haven’t outted you, I know that you’re doing it because I know how this shit goes down. I’ve been a mod before on a site that was intended for adults (too many of whom acted like 5yr olds) and I see the same exact patterns happening here. You may feel like your opinion will be met with hostility if you post it here but as long as you’re respectful, it’s the other guy/girl acting hostile that’s causing a problem, not you. Post your issues here, publicly or hush your mouth about it. If a mod tells you to do something, like “no PMs about this” they have a reason. Do what they tell you whether it’s in the pinned rules or not.

On the matter of “trickier to police” mentioned above. When you see your fellow forumite posting something saucy or off topic, it doesn’t have to be a hostile situation to give a gentle nudge back in the right direction. “lol TMI buddy!” or “eye bleach!” With a little :rofl: (even if you’re not laughing) it’s a non-hostile way to give a reminder. If someone gives you such a reminder you don’t have to be defensive about it, we can all edit our own posts. This doesn’t have to be pissing contest of who’s right or wrong. You certainly do not need to go running off to the mods to tattle unless it’s graphic and the person won’t change it. We should be able to handle it among ourselves 99% of the time.

Natural drift can happen and it isn’t always a bad thing, it’s how we bond and get to know each other. Some of the best convos I’ve been in here started as a mixing question and ended up with five other subjects getting covered that broadened my knowledge and my love for this forum. It’s natural to go from Marshmallow, to a toasted flavoring, to a smores recipe, to chocolates and additives to smooth out throat hit. That’s not off topic. If the original question wasn’t answered, answer it and tag the OP to be sure they see it! Don’t go running to the mods demanding a split into five different topics. We can split our own too if you really think it’s warranted.

About civility and the rules…. Too many times as a mod, I saw people using the sharpest interpretation of the written rules as a vendetta to flag a post or run to the mods every time their arch enemy deviated one little drop. Stop doing that! Yes, I know people are doing it. No, none of the mods have told me, they don’t have to. Then… and mods tell me I’m wrong if I am…when the mods refuse to enforce your interpretation of the rules you accuse them of favoritism. Nah…sunshine, that’s crap. You don’t interpret the rules, they do. Sit down!

There are other times that I’ve seen, both in the past and recently on here, where a particularly toxic member has baited and slighted, thrown low key digs and arrows at multiple people month after month all technically within the rules. Then one of their victims, who is normally kind and helpful in every other way, snaps back at the toxic person with some verbal abuse. The mods see who the real perpetrator is, they’ve been dealing with complaints for months now but most people don’t see the bigger picture or they don’t notice it. It’s perfectly justified for the mods to clean up the bad comments, hand out a warning to the person who snapped and not ban them, even though they are the ones who technically broke the rules. It’s not just sweeping shit under the rug and covering for their favorite people. There’s far more going on here than what it looks like on the surface. My point here is to illustrate, it’s no one else’s place to second guess the decisions the mods make. We, the general public have no idea all the things our mods know that we do not.

I’ve seen a lot of tyrannical, power mad mods all over the net. Such mods are not here. Jojo and Ken have bent over backwards to be fair to everyone. Far too many people think “fair” means banning who you say, deleting what you don’t like, etc. No, it means doing what’s best in the long run for the entire community. You’re not going to get everything you want and neither am I, sorry.

TLDR? :pensive: Stop pestering our mods over every petty little thing! They’re not baby sitters!

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I´m joined the ELR last year, so i´m a new member. For me it is a great forum with a great community. I read a lot, i wrote a little bit. I get a lot of information everyday. I use the search function. If i don´t get what i´m searching for, i ask. Works great for me. I never had any problems. Ok, sometimes threads go off topic. Everybody is free to say: hey get back to topic! Or read it, sometimes its funny and interesting. Or scroll down to the next information you are interested in. It´s really easy.

About the adult stuff. Where can i find it?:sunglasses: I never saw any pics of dicks or vaginas in any thread. “strong words”? FUCK, we are adults! Love Vaping Bogan! To offend another people directly, is not ok, but i didn´t saw that happen.

The ELR has plenty of different categories. If you read in the pub, it can happen that someone says something you don´t like. ITS A PUB! You are free to leave the thread. I hope nobody holds a gun to your head and force you to read the thread.

From the perspective of new member, everything is ok with this forum. I like being here and feel good.

Just my 2 cents

Over&out
Weedhunter

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I’ve shared my thoughts on this with @JMak642 and I’ll repeat them here so everyone will know what goes on in my little pea brain.

Yes, I do feel if all a person does is throw links at someone that’s not entirely like helping them. People always get help though, so I don’t think providing the links should be discouraged. Because although that personal level of guidance is wonderful, people also need to help themselves. Sure, we could just keep hammering away at our keyboards repeating things ad nauseam. But stop and consider the enormous thought and energy some of these linked posts had behind them. Think of the wealth of information.

When I link obvious newbies, it’s not entirely impersonal. I link 3 specific posts, beginning with “Read the original post for the following threads. You will gain a much better understanding of things new mixers have questions about.” I know, that’s not a lot of hand holding. But the work went into the articles and if anyone can explain to me why it has to be redone, I’m listening.

Just since December, comments to one of these threads are…

WOWOWOWOWOW - I am extremely amazed, grateful, and disappointed (in myself mainly) all at the same time. LOL

I truly wish I had stumbled upon this post when I first started DIYing.

I wish I had read this before buying my first couple flavor orders!

What brilliant information. Thank you. I’m new to mixing and this will really help.

That article is a year and 5 months old, and still getting praise from newbies. Obviously still relevant. So while it may seem unwelcoming to some to respond to new folks with links, it also is appreciated. Yeah, they have to read. Good, I’d rather them read and learn a ton than me type my butt off and them learn a little. So I’ll keep linking - it’s the fastest way I know to provide the most help in the shortest amount of time.

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You said it much better than I could have. Sometimes, everything I could tell someone, I learned from one or two key threads. It feels dishonest of me to answer a question as if I’m so knowledgeable when really, I’ve got this stuff bookmarked for my own reference. Most of the time I try to give a brief answer as well as telling them to follow the links.

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This is what I tried to raise as a point in this thread, glad you said about it again.

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Same here. I don’t think @Ken_O_Where or @JMak642 or anyone else is saying we shouldn’t ever link people. In fact I’m sure they know “link me dude” is in most people’s lexicon. What I’ve seen before, which I think may be entirely less appreciated, is when someone asks a question and a person responds - rather than using a helpful tone, comes across condescending - and says something like this question has been answered over and over. Here read X article. That’s not very friendly or welcoming, and could make the new member feel they’ve come to the wrong place.

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