ELR Home   Create recipe   Resource page   My recipes/favorites

It Tastes Like What?

Just for amusement, I started compiling a list of flavor notes taken by people doing SFT’s. With a slightly twisted ability to conjure up some off-the-wall images of what a flavor tastes like to them. The focus is pretty much on bad flavors and their metaphorically colorful descriptions. Please feel free to add any ‘informative’ descriptions you’ve run across.

*Caramel Cappuccino (TPA)
More of a chemical weapon than a flavor… with just mild hints of skunk spray, raw meat, and onion juice.
*Joy (FA)
Stale, flat cheap beer left out in the open for a week.
*Joy (FA) another perspective…
Tastes like you spilled Coors light on the floor, waited until the next day, anointed the puddle with just a few drops of vegetable oil, gave it a gentle dusting of powdered sugar, and then tried to lick all of that up.
*Guava (TPA) and Guava (FA)
Tastes like chemical plant runoff (from two different chemical plants.)
*Brown Sugar Cookie SC (WF)
It’s got the same sort of meth lab/piss flavor as TFA Honey, with a lot of dark sweetness and not so much rotten florality.
*Shortbread (Inawera)
Tastes like you tried to make a shortbread, ran out of good butter somewhere short of mixing the dough, and supplemented the rest with some rancid old butter.
*Milk Caramel Candy (SC) (WF)
A rich buttery milky finish, but it’s all covered in nasty, kinda like barf but more like blue cheese. It’s caramel covered blue cheese!
*Soy Milk (FE)
Nice creamy body, but why does it have to taste like creamed corn?
*Oatmeal Cookie (TPA)
Raw corrugated cardboard with a splash of vanilla and sprinkle of dry cinnamon.
*Green Tea (TPA)
Mostly green tea, but there’s also a whole lot of lawn clippings in there.
*Root Beer (TPA)
Tastes like smoking crack with a root beer barrel candy and a piece of black licorice in your mouth.
*Western Blend (Inawera)
It just tastes like licking a messy toddler’s chocolate fingerprints off of a saddle.

These are just a few and I’ve run across much better ones, if I can remember where I saw them. Again, please feel free to contribute. You may just save someone from making a bad choice!

21 Likes

Sounds like something I would say, though that isn’t mine.

10 Likes

Kentucky Bourbon TFA by wh1skeyk1ng

As a whiskey connoisseur, I was really hoping for this to have some bourbon/whiskey notes. It doesn’t. It tastes more like sugar with a slight hint of alcohol that fades out after a few days, with the remaining flavor being comparable to the scent of a night club at 10 o’clock the next morning: stale beer and spilled drinks.

My thoughts exactly.

11 Likes

Caramel Mocha (SC)
SFT, 2.5% 2week steep, fuggedaboutit!
Nasty Stuff!
#RoadKill

9 Likes

This one made me chuckle…

Vanilla custard v2 (cap)

This is as dairy as it gets but not necessarily in a good way.
S’n’V : Felt like Heidi after milking 10 cows and 3 sheep. To make an analogy if FA creams and custard were made with skimmed UHT milk this one would be made with fresh full fat milk.

12 Likes

*Honey (WF)
At 1% I get only the slightest hint of cat piss that seems to come and go, not a constant full-on cat piss assault on the senses like any amount of TFA Honey.
*Berry (Crunch) Cereal (TPA)
Like eating a Belvita breakfast biscuit, boring but somehow virtuous. I don’t know how to explain it, but I felt healthier after trying this. They should rename it ‘Fruity Cardboard’.
*Fruit Circles (TPA)
The first few MLs of this was like vaping an air freshener refill. I didn’t even have to make any notes in my book, it’s so perfectly unforgettable. Whatever the worst, most offensive word in your language is, chalk that up as a pretty accurate one-word description of this flavour. Comfortably the worst single flavour I’ve ever tried. Had to scrub out my atomiser a good handful of times afterwards with hot soapy water. I think it’s still tainted.

14 Likes

Apple (Tart Granny Smith) - The Flavor/Perfumer’s Apprentice

Tastes like someone pickled a Granny Smith Apple in apple cider vinegar!! Oh my God, I can’t get the taste off of my tongue!!!

8 Likes

Not EVEN going to ask… /smhwg

(the wg=while grimacing)

5 Likes

TFA Popcorn Movie Theater - Picture this, a disgruntled cinema concession worker wants to be fired in a spectacular way, not just fail to show up for work like a “beta cuck loser.” So when you politely ask for extra butter on your popcorn, he opens a fresh cafeteria-sized can of fake butter and guzzles it right in front of you. You’re watching him full-body clench hearing that retchy sound several times as he chugs it down, his stomach trying to violently reject this abuse, but he somehow manages to hold it down. Once the oversized can is empty, he wipes his greasy mouth, leaving a yellow stain on his sleeve, smiles maniacally, and sprays a gallon of fake butter puke all over your popcorn before handing you your red and white free refill sized bucket of popcorn, overflowing with stomach acid laced artificially-butter flavored partially hydrogenated soybean oil. That, right there, is TFA Popcorn Movie Theater.

13 Likes

Bwahahahahaha!
I snorted so loud, I think I tore some nasal tissues…

7 Likes

C’mon you’ve never wondered what a meth lab tastes like?

5 Likes

And some more…

  • Grape Soda (TPA)
    Grape medicine 100%. Specifically Dimetapp.

  • Papaya (Health Cabin)
    It tastes very much like regurgitated papaya. Like you ate papaya, puked it up an hour later, and tried to vape it.

  • Summer Clouds (FA)
    Tastes like a hint of peach and a whole lot of dryer sheets.
    (I prefer the strawberry dryer sheets myself -tz)

11 Likes

Aah TZ, I see we both read/remember some good ones. I’ll see your 3.

INW Cherimoya - Yellow Apple and Banana, with some Pineapple. Mostly tastes like a porno involving a banana banging an overripe golden delicious apple, with a pineapple filming it. I can’t remember who said this, but I remember someone called it “sweaty,” which… Yes.

RFSC Guava - Tropical ketchup. Theres some sweet, ripe tropical fruit in there that might be a guava but it tastes like it was drenched in ketchup. Bit more depth to it than Im used with most Real Flavors and thats where it gets fruitier, but that top note is strong and it just… tastes like ketchup.

FA Pineapple - One of my earliest experiences with a truly horrible flavor, and still to this day one of the worst flavors I have ever tried, an abomination of almost biblical proportions. Rotten pineapple, green onions, and burnt tires.

9 Likes

OMG I loved these! I needed a laugh and this delivered. I also don’t feel so alone now when I don’t like the taste of a flavor. Wow, they didn’t hold back. So creative!

6 Likes

ROFLMAO!

I hate dryer sheets!!!..with a passion. I’ll never try that flavor…never!

6 Likes

Blurch! This here is the stomach acid. It looks like infant upchuck.

5 Likes

I am so sorry. I have adopted RTAs with silicone o-rings that were impregnated with such a putrid smell I had to search the internet for solutions. Not one solution worked, it took all of them over a course of 2 weeks…and the damn smell is still alive and lingering.

4 Likes

Fresh asphalt and thermoplastic road paint.

4 Likes

I’m not trying to hijack this thread but it really doesn’t warrant a whole thread by itself. Just wondering…did all of you think that Fruit Loops rings each had a different fruit flavor? I did.

5 Likes

Heck, I didn’t even know until recently that each rice krispie was an actual grain of rice.

6 Likes